A Never Ending Dilemma
by Deboa
Summary: We all knew that Zack wasn't the smartest guy around, but did anyone expect him to turn out like this?  One Shot  Happy Birthday tiger002!


**A/N - This story is for tiger002's birthday! I chose to write this story for his birthday because I know how much he appreciates unique stories. ^_^**

** - Also, I would like to thank WaldoJeffers for helping me fix up some story issues!  
**

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A Never Ending Dilemma

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"It's morning," I happily shout as I toss my blanket aside. I quickly make my way to the blinds and raise them up, revealing a particularly sunny day. Next, I open the window and take in the heat of the outdoor weather. I can already tell that today will be as rewarding as I'd anticipated.

As I have mentioned already, today is the day I have been waiting for. Woody's finally home from his month long trip to Europe and I plan to give him a surprise visit. I quickly throw myself together, not forgetting the necessities, my key, my gloves, and my trusty pocket knife. There is no better friend in a man's life than his weapon. It protects him like a parent. I never actually used mine, but I feel like a lost child without it.

As I exit my house, I greet the mailman as he hands me my mail. I normally don't run into him as he arrives at my house, but I guess today would be an exception. We have a nice talk about how we're doing and such. I say great, although that is only true to point, but isn't that the case in everyone's lives?

Being that Woody is only a couple of houses away, I decide to walk there. The walk to his house feels a bit strange. I guess it's because he's been gone for so long that I am not used to walking toward it.

I approach his house within a few minutes and notice that his car is in parked in the driveway. At least I know he's home. I probably should have called first to verify that he was home and even wanted to come over today, but I guess my desire to surprise him didn't let me do so.

As I proceed through his gate, I feel a tap on my back. I turn around to discover a little boy, about four and a half feet tall, standing below me and smiling. "Hi there mister, Will you buy some cookies? They taste great," he says, confidently.

"Not now," I say, with a tone implying that I don't want any part of the boy and his cookies. Little kids tend to irritate me. From their petite voices to their constant ecstasy, I would never want a part of them.

The boy stands there as I walk into Woody's backyard. I kind of just shrug him off as no big deal. Most people would buy his cookies simply because he's a little kid, but I am not like most people I guess.

I stop at the turn of the house when I notice Woody tanning on his lawn chair. Being sneaky is a must if I want to surprise him!

I tip toe in his direction very slowly as to not become noticed. Once I'm within a foot away from giving Woody his surprise welcome, a voice behind me, obviously belonging to the boy, pleads with me. "Are you sure you don't want some cookies? They sure taste delicious," he exclaims. Woody twitches and sits up a bit. Panicking that my plan is crumbling apart, I grab my pocket knife from my back pocket and shove it through Woody's chest! I then cuff my hand over his mouth to prevent any unwanted noise. After he loses consciousness, I turn around and find that the boy is out of sight. "What if he tells somebody? I have to find that kid," I whisper as I fling the knife a few yards away and head for the gate, knowing that my fingerprints are securely not on on the knife due to my gloves.

* * *

As I walk to the front lawn, I recall the reason why I killed Woody. I grind my teeth just thinking about it. He warned me not to talk to his girlfriend, Addison, while he was on vacation or he would ensure I lost my job, since he is an assistant manager at the store I work in. He knew I had a bit of a thing for Addison even though I never acted on it for his sake. This time, however, Addison and I had begun dating when he was gone. We both decided to be together for one month and then, when Woody would return, act as if nothing ever happened.

However, on one bright afternoon, my brother Cody, Addison and I all went to the beach to hang out. Unfortunately, after about an hour of swimming in the ocean, the tide began to overpower us. Me and Cody managed to make it back to shore, but Addison couldn't fight the tide. The lifeguards tried to get to her, but the tide was just too strong. As a result, Addison as well as one of the life guards died a tragic death. I became really frustrated with myself. Things couldn't possibly get any worse as far as I was concerned. Little did I know, there was more to come.

After a lot of sobbing in the bathroom, I returned to Cody who was just staring out into the ocean. We both reassured ourselves that everything would be fine. I bought that until Cody informed me that he told Woody via phone call what had happened. He told him everything, including that I was there when it happened.

The frustration of everything that had happened on that day amplified with the thought of me losing my job. I didn't tell Cody I was mad at him because I didn't want him to know about Woody's threat, but that only made me even more panicked. I lost the girl I was with in an accident and my job was the one thing I had left. In the grand scheme of things, I would never allow Woody to take my job away. Especially after I just accidentally killed Addison. I had enough guilt and didn't want to lose my job on top of it all.

So after killing his girlfriend, I had to exterminate Woody so I wouldn't lose my job. I know it's a crazy thing to do, but I didn't really have a choice. The only way to assure that I do not go down is to kill. When I killed Addison I felt extremely guilty, but this time I feel as if a huge weight was just released from my back. However, a minor one has just dropped itself on me with that kid witnessing my murderous act. That will be fixed momentarily though.

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Once I arrive at the front of his house, I look down the sidewalk to see if the boy is in sight. Unfortunately I do not see him. However, I begin to hear a voice. "Mister I'm over here. Did you change your mind about the cookies? Just let me finish selling them to this customer first," shouts the child from across the street.

"He is definitely going to threaten me. I guess I have no choice. I just have to take him out too," I sigh, annoyed about the whole scenario. First Addison, then Woody, and now some little kid. It's like murdering is a chore these days.

I run back to Woody's backyard and search through his shed. 'There has to be something in here that I can use to get rid of the kid,' I ponder to myself as I rummage through Woody's belongings. "Ahhh yes. This is perfect!" I grin as I hold up a big metal pole. After I become confident that the pole will surely do the task I need it to, I head back to the front of Woody's house.

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Keeping me and the pole out of sight, I creep behind a car and place the metal pole on top of it. I have to wait until the boy walks past the car to drop the pole on his head. In this particular case, it will look like nothing more than a mere accident.

After finishing with his sale, the boy walks towards the sidewalk from the patio of the customer. "I wonder where that man went. Guess I'll see him some other time," he says with a careless tone. He then walks the opposite way of the car I was behind. With an irritated state of mind, I pick up the pole and continue to follow him.

After I am led to my house by the child, I decide that using my car for a hit and run would be much simpler and more effective. I get into my car and quickly pull out from my driveway. I approach the stop sign at full speed as the child nears the right side of the street. Suddenly, he stops in the middle of the street without looking up. I barely miss him and, halfway through the next block, I run out of gas but with just enough time to pull over. Infuriated that my plans keep failing, I honk the car horn as loud as I can several times.

After a few seconds of honking I hear a knock on my window. It is the boy again. "You really need to watch where you're going mister. Do you still want some cookies? I have a variety of flavors," he mentions, searching through his bag of cookies. I get out of the car and slam it with all my might. I pull my right hand back and thrust it forward, smacking his bag of cookies out of his hand. "Hey that wasn't very nice," the boy shouts at me as he bends down to pick up his cookies. I open the back door so that I could take out my metal pole and finish him.

I grasp the pole and turn back around, swinging it with me. The only problem is that the boy is no longer there. I look down and see a bag of cookies where he once was. "You can keep that bag. Hope you have a great day. Maybe I can see you again some time," he yells from the end of block.

I continue to stare at the boy as he walks off into the distance. What the hell? First he gives me free cookies and then he says he wants to see me again some time? Wait just a minute. He didn't see the events that occurred before. He wouldn't be so ecstatic in my presence if he had witnessed what I had done.

Relieved, I fling the roll the metal pole down the street and walk up the steps of my house, ignoring my poorly parked car and the metal pole quickly moving into the intersection at the end of the block. I look down the street and see police cars piling up in front of Woody's house along with an ambulance. "What a bunch of naïve fools," I say to myself with a grin across my face as I walk into my house. Now that my chores for today are complete, I can finally relax knowing I have nothing to worry about.

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_I know this is very different from the writing I usually do, but it just came to me. Many may not like the fact that Zack is a bit of a psychopathic murderer, but I thought it would be original and an interesting look on things. I in know way was trying to show hatred toward Zack's character or any other person's in this story._

_Anyway, I would like to wish Tiger a very Happy Birthday! Hope you enjoy your special day as well as this story! I know if anyone can handle a crazy story like this without hating on it for its plot, it will be you! Please be sure to tell me what you think in a review as well as anyone else who would like to do so!__  
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